Reflecting God's Love
Sometimes it can be hard to love someone who we feel does not deserve it. See how this girl turned to the Bible for help with her relationship with her mother.
Categories: Loving and Forgiving
Unwanted and unloved, I felt like the outcast of an already screwed up family -- a train wreck. Slaps, kicks, punches, and yelling were common for me in my family. No matter what, it was always my fault. And "father" is a foreign word for me, for mine left the family.
One time, a fight between my mom and me was so severe that the beating my mom gave me was visible to my counselor, who was obligated to report it to CPS (child protective services). The abuse wasn't severe enough for them to take me out of my home, but it was bad enough that I was given a few days away just to get out of the house.
This was the turning point -- when I knew that I needed to make a change in my life. Reconnecting to God helped me realize that things couldn't go on as they were. I started by changing myself. I've learned that you can never change others' old habits or the way they are; that is something they must do for themselves. And I've learned that the only way your life can move forward is by being the bigger person -- by being selfless.
There's a story in the Bible in the book of John that shows the power of love and forgiveness. The Pharisees bring to Jesus a woman who was caught committing adultery (cpt 8). They tell him that the law of Moses says she should be stoned, but they ask him what he thinks should be done, trying to trap him. Jesus ignores them, writing on the ground. They persist, so he finally stands and answers, "Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her" (8:7 KJV). "One by one," everyone starts leaving until Jesus is left with the woman alone. He asks her if anyone is left to condemn her. She says no, and he says, "Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more" (8:11).
It was the love that filled Jesus' heart which enabled him to forgive a woman who was supposed to be condemned to death. He also took himself out of a lose/lose situation. He told them the truth -- something so simple -- and let them make their own decision. This gave the woman a chance to start over.
I love this story because it shows how love can overpower the bad in a situation. It helped me with my mom because the pure purpose behind forgiveness gave me the motivation to forgive myself for not being able to forgive my mom. And that started the whole process of forgiveness.
I can now say that I have forgiven my mom. The way she treated me wasn't right, but I no longer resent her for treating me that way. I finally was able to look past the error in the situation and see the true image of her, her God-given image, and this allowed me to love her.