Trust in the Lord with All Thy Heart
Feeling stressed? Check out how Katya dealt with a particularly stressful time in her life.
Categories: Health, Loss
My life was going great. I had nothing to worry about. I couldn't complain about anything. My grades were good, and I got along with my teachers. My relationships with my friends were strong, and I was getting along with my family. I was achieving my goals, and everything was in place.
But soon my life would flip upside down. Coming back to my boarding school after winter break was when everything changed. The first week of being back at school, I began to deal with stress. I was overwhelmed. Everything was thrown at me at the same time, and I couldn't deal with all of it. My grades began to drop. I began to drift from my friends: we weren't agreeing on much, and our conflicts seemed to grow more and more. I was dealing with decisions that put more stress on me to the point where I would cry every night. To put the cherry on the top, I got sick. I was so weak that walking from my room to the bathroom made me tired, nauseas, and dizzy. The only thing that my body could handle was sleeping and just lying down.
Two weeks went by, and I began to worry. My illness was not improving. It seemed when one part of it would leave my body, another one would enter and make me feel even worse. Being away from my family made it so much harder; I felt alone, with no help from anyone.
So I decided to turn to God and ask for help -- to ask for the comfort of my mother and His love that would heal me and help me get my life back. But my illness manufactured doubts and fear. I was begging to be angry with God. I would ask Him, "Why are you testing me? Why are you doing this to me? Why are you not helping me?" I felt isolated and alone with no hope of getting better or getting my life back. I didn't tell anyone how alone and scared I felt.
Finally I decided to talk to my dad. He told me that I didn't need to fear or be angry with God. He explained to me that it was hard to improve in this situation because of my thought. I would have to clear my thought of all the negativity and doubt and reconnect with God. I would have to have more faith and trust in Him.
So I took his advice. I stopped worrying about what would happen tomorrow or about my grades and all my other problems. I stopped focusing on what was wrong with my life or on trying to find some human way to fix my problems. I simply placed my problems into God's hands and trusted Him with fixing all that was broken. I trusted God to eliminate my loneliness and fill my heart with comfort and love. All I had to do was strengthen my faith in God.
Soon my life began switching to the right road. My grades were getting better; my friends and I solved our problems; my illness disappeared; the sense of being alone and isolated from everyone left. I also learned that someone else I know had just gone through the exact same challenges.
I came to see that many people go through difficult times, and they resolve their problems by turning to God. I saw a relation between my experience and experiences of those in the Bible. One particular story stood out to me; it's the story of Job. Both Job and I had to trust and love God to be able to fix our problems.
In the Bible story, Job was described as "perfect and upright" (Job 1:1). He had everything a man would desire to have. Job "feared" (or trusted) God. But then, a lot of unfortunate events happened to Job. After losing his animals and servants, "a great wind from the wilderness" tore down the house, and the walls collapsed on his children (1:19). He lost everything. He was left with nothing; he was alone, full of fear. But the Bible tells us, "In all this Job sinned not, nor charged God foolishly" (1:22). Despite the devastating events, Job maintained his faith in God. Job got everything back -- but even better. His trust in God blessed him.
This story was helpful to me. I didn't have faith in God for some time. I didn't trust that God would solve my problems. Sometimes we have to be shown that trust and faith in God do make a difference. My life was restored, too. I learned that such trust enables us to achieve anything. Our relationship with God is extremely important. I rediscovered my relationship with God.