Handling Self-Doubt

By Sarah Stolfa, teenager


How do you get rid of self-doubt when you don't feel good enough for your friends?


Many teens today, including myself, are either currently dealing with or have dealt with the fear of not feeling good enough for their parents, themselves, or their friends. While some may think that there is no hope, I have actually found examples from the Bible that have helped me realize that feelings of inadequacy can be overcome. I was able to break through this fear. While it was difficult, I think that it is really important that teens realize that it can be overcome. Confidence in yourself is one of the greatest things you can have.

One of the most familiar examples from the Bible takes place when God has asked Moses to free the Israelites. Moses makes it very clear that he does not think they will trust him or even believe that God would talk to a guy like him. We read in Exodus, "Moses objected, 'They won't trust me. They won't listen to a word I say. They're going to say, 'God? Appear to him? Hardly!'" (The Message, Ex 4:1). Moses thinks people will think that he is just a big joke or question why he got chosen by God.

As teens, we can relate to Moses. We deal with the fear of looking like a joke in front of our friends. But we know that things for Moses turned out pretty well all because he used his faith in God and was able to find confidence within himself. So things for us can turn out well if we trust in God to give us confidence.

I actually have dealt with feeling like I am not good enough for my friends. At the end of sixth grade, my best friend informed me that she would no longer be coming to the same school as me. I had other friends, but I was not as comfortable around them as I was with her. This came at the worst time because the next year, I would be making the transition into middle school, an already nerve-racking experience. I was talking to one of my other friends about this, and she was making me feel worse and worse about myself, to the point where I didn't want to talk to anyone.

Eventually, seventh grade started, and I had to face my problem of self doubt. I was able to talk to the friend who had made me feel bad, and we both realized that what she thought was just joking around had actually made my self-confidence diminish. We became stronger friends than we already were, and we are still friends today. I feel completely comfortable around her and most importantly, I feel equal to her.

The feeling of not being good enough is common among teenagers. But once you are able to overcome your self doubt, it is easier to enjoy your life. I am in high school right now, and this new-found self-confidence helped me enjoy my freshman year. While it was challenging, I am really happy that I was able to overcome self-doubt. I hope more teens are able to realize how good they really are.