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Finding a Home for her Child

Here’s the story of a girl whose birth mother made a huge, positive difference in her life by placing her with a loving family.

Many people complain about how their lives are so hard or unfair, or how worthless their whole life is. Some of my closest friends feel that they are a “mistake.” That makes me really mad. No one who is alive now should ever be called a “mistake.” I could’ve been considered a “mistake,” but my birth mother decided differently.

My birth mother had me when she was 16. My birth father was a different ethnicity than my birth mother. At first, he planned on staying with her, but my birth mother’s dad was racist and made my birth father change his mind and leave. Once that happened, my birth mother was afraid for me because she didn’t know what her dad would do when I was born. So there was a lot more pressure put on her in this situation because of her dad’s racism.

She had a very hard decision to make. My life and safety were important to her. My birth mother decided to have me and to find a new home for me. She started to search for my new home. She found some people she liked, but she wanted to make sure that my parents were good people. She wanted to see for herself that nothing bad would happen to me. She went to see them. After talking with them for awhile, she decided she liked them. They made a match.

When the day came to sign the papers that said I wouldn’t be hers anymore, my birth mother cried. But she signed the papers. She chose life over death for me. She chose a loving home for me.

There’s a story in the Bible that has helped me (I Kings 3:16-28). There are these two women living in the same household who both bear a child around the same time. One night, one woman accidentally rolls over on her baby and smothers it. She trades her dead child for the living child while the other mother is asleep. When the mother of the living child discovers what has had happened, both she and the other mother go to King Solomon. Each tells him that the living child is hers. Solomon says to cut the baby down the middle and each would get a half. He raises his sword. The baby’s real mother screams, falls to her knees, and begs him to give the baby to the other woman. At that moment, the king says that the child belongs to the woman who wants the child to live -- the real mother.

The mother really loved her child and wanted him to live, even if she wasn’t going to be the one to raise him. That takes a lot of courage and trust -- more than just a gut feeling. That takes trust in the Lord, knowing that God will follow your child’s footsteps and keep him or her from falling. My birth mother had that trust.

So whenever anyone tries to say how his or her life is worthless, I say, “At least you’re here.” I cherish every moment of life.